


crushes the breath from my chest

by memitims



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Basketball, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-10
Updated: 2015-01-10
Packaged: 2018-03-06 22:18:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3150335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/memitims/pseuds/memitims
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>loving bucky is an immutable fact of steve’s life</p>
            </blockquote>





	crushes the breath from my chest

Steve wakes up to the sound of sirens blaring from down below on the busy streets of the city. He doesn’t hear much from the 17th floor of the Stark high-rise, he’s pretty sure Tony designed something in the walls that keeps the bustle and noise from New York City out, but Steve likes to leave his window open, so the sirens inevitably reach his ears.

He throws his covers off and slides out of bed, reaching into the closet for a pair of jeans and his favorite blue sweater.  _It really brings out your eyes_ , Bucky had told him, a few weeks ago when he’d had a few beers with Sam and had lost some semblance of his filter. Steve had grinned at him for a beat too long, his cheeks flushing red when Sam gave him an incredulous look. Sam was always surprised when Bucky said anything remotely sweet to Steve, because Bucky didn’t really say anything nice to anyone.

Steve pads out into the hallway and freezes when he gets to the doorway of the kitchen. Something inside Steve aches when he takes in the scene before him, because Bucky’s standing at the stove flipping pancakes, and he’s no longer standing in the clean, shiny kitchen of Stark Tower, but rather their old dingy apartment back in Brooklyn, where Bucky would scrape up whatever food they had to make a decent meal and Steve would watch him from the kitchen table, sitting with his sketchbook and pretending that he wasn’t drawing the way Bucky’s eyes crinkled when he looked over and smiled at Steve. Steve wonders if Bucky remembers that. There’s a lot Bucky doesn’t remember, but there’s some he does. _I used to tell you stories when we couldn’t sleep_ , Bucky had said the other day, out of the blue.  _Yeah_ , Steve had replied, his voice breaking dangerously on the word.

Steve shakes his head and he’s back in the present day.

“Mornin’,” Bucky calls over his shoulder. “Made pancakes.”

“I can see that,” Steve grins. “But there’s about a 65% chance they taste like shit.”

Bucky makes an appalled noise at that. “I’m a damn good cook, Rogers. You wouldn’t be here today if I hadn’t fed your skinny ass for all those years.”

So Bucky did remember.  _Yeah_ , Steve wants to say,  _probably wouldn’t have gotten anywhere without you_. It’s true. Bucky saved his life more times than Steve can count, and not just by fending off bullies and taking care of him when he was sick.

Steve nods his head and lets the conversation drop. It’s too early in the morning to talk about things that are so real and painful and practically from another lifetime. He sidles up to the stove and inspects the pancakes.

“Well,” Steve says, “those look somewhat edible.”

Bucky smacks him on the shoulder with the spatula.

\---

They head up to Tony’s floor after breakfast, because JARVIS had told them that Tony needed to talk to him and Bucky about something urgently important.

“Do you guys know what basketball is?” Tony asks when they step inside his apartment. Pepper’s sitting on the couch behind him, tapping away on her cell phone. Steve really hopes he’s joking and Tony didn’t just call them all the way up to the 30th floor to talk about sports, of all things. Tony’s expression doesn’t change though, and Steve’s pretty sure he’s serious.

“Are you kidding me?” he asks. “That’s what you wanted to talk to us about?”

Pepper draws a hand up to her mouth to stifle a laugh. Tony spins around and glares at her. She shrugs her shoulders. “Told you they wouldn’t be amused.”

Steve groans. He glances over at Bucky, who’s glaring at Tony, his eyes narrowed. It’s exactly the way Bucky used to look at Steve when he’d come home bloody and bruised from a fight.  _Whoever did this_ , Bucky would say,  _better watch their damn back_ , swearing vengeance for his best friend. Steve doesn’t know how long it’s been since he’s seen Bucky’s face like that, but it warms something inside him.

“Okay, but seriously,” Tony says. “Do you know what basketball is?”

Steve nods. “It’s the one with the nets.”

“Some of the guys used to play it during the war, I think,” Bucky adds, his eyebrows crossed in concentration, his face scrunched up in the way it always does when he’s trying to remember traces of their old life. “Steve and I have watched it on the television.”

“How do you feel about playing it?” Tony asks. “I built a court on the 23rd floor and I need people to test it out. I don’t play myself, and Pepper refuses, and the rest of your colleagues don’t believe it to be a worthwhile use of time.”

Steve laughs. “It’s not a worthwhile use of time.”

Bucky turns to him, eyes twinkling in that rare way of his, the way that used to make all the ladies swoon and Steve’s heart beat harder against his ribcage. “You’re just afraid I’m gonna beat ya.”

"I'd like to see you try," Steve says, folding his arms over his chest.

Bucky raises his eyebrows in surprise at Steve's challenge. "You may not be that scrawny kid I grew up with, with all your big scary muscles now, but I still know all your weak spots, Rogers."

Steve’s weak spot is standing right in front of him.  _It’s you_ , Steve wants to say,  _Captain America’s Achilles heel, his fatal flaw_ , but he shoves the words back down.

“Sure,” Steve says instead, moving closer to Bucky and drawing himself up to his full height. “You always were too cocky for your own good, Buck. It’ll be nice to take you down a peg.”

“And you were always too dumb to know when to run away from a losing battle,” teases Bucky. “You sure you wanna do this, buddy?”

“Positive.”

Bucky turns on his heel and starts towards the elevator, Steve following close behind.

"Holy shit. That was literally disgusting," Steve overhears Tony remark as they leave the room. "That was  _the_  most sexual tension in a conversation that I've ever seen."

Pepper pats him on the shoulder. "Let those kids work it out for themselves, Tony. They'll get there."

Steve feels a blush spreading over his cheeks, he's not stupid, he knows what they’re talking about. He knows that everyone else notices how the rest of Steve's world disappears when he talks to Bucky, the way his eyes linger on his best friend for too long, the way they sit too close on the couch in front of the television. There's not much he can do about it, anyways. Bucky used to be his whole world, before the train, before his world slid into grey, and it's cheesy as hell, but he's gotten a second chance to see colors again because Bucky's back. Maybe not all the way – one if his arms is no longer flesh and bone, and there's holes in his memory, and he shakes from nightmares and he hardly laughs – but that doesn't bother Steve. He'd take any version of Bucky, he'd take every version of Bucky. It's just an immutable fact of Steve's life.

\---

They’re both horrible at basketball. It’s kind of hilarious, actually. Steve shoots with too much force and misses the net every time, while Bucky has phenomenal accuracy, but can’t get the ball away from Steve long enough to shoot it.

Tony and Pepper watch from glass windows high above the court, laughing practically the whole time. They somehow recruit Sam to come watch too, and he doubles over laughing, barely able to catch his breath when Steve throws the ball so hard at the backboard that it comes rocketing back towards him.

Steve grabs the rebound and Bucky wraps himself around Steve’s back, trying to steal the ball away. He seems wary though, too careful to push too hard, to let his metal arm come too close to Steve’s body, like Steve’s something fragile and not 200 pounds of supersoldier. There’s still something nice – Steve has to admit – about having Bucky’s hands all over his body. He tries not to think about that too much, because thoughts like that make him consider doing stupid things.

“We’re really awful,” laughs Steve, after missing his third shot in a row.

Bucky scoffs. “Speak for yourself. At least I can get it in the hoop.” His fingers brush along Steve’s shoulders and Steve shivers. He was too lazy to change, so he’s still wearing that sweater, which was a bad idea because his body feels like it’s on fire.

Bucky swipes the ball away from Steve and takes an overconfident half-court shot that comes close, but hits the rim and spins away from the hoop. They both take off after it, sprinting towards the other end of the court. Steve can’t stop in time, so he slams into the padded walls of the gym, Bucky falling against him from behind. Turning around, Steve finds himself trapped between Bucky’s arms, crowding him against the wall. Bucky’s close, too close, and his breath falls across Steve’s lips. His eyes are trained on Steve’s mouth.

“Oh, Christ,” Steve hears Tony say from above.

He’s not sure who moves first, but Bucky’s lips are on his in a second, the basketball long forgotten. Steve’s thought about kissing Bucky for as long as he can remember, but nothing he could have imagined compares to the real thing. It’s messy and sweet and their teeth clink against each other.

“Did we do this?” Bucky asks, breaking off the kiss. “Before, I mean?”

Steve looks away. “No. Don’t think either of us ever worked up the courage before.” He takes a deep breath, tasting Bucky on his lips. “Shit, sorry. We can stop. If you want.”

Bucky laughs. It’s electric, goes right down to Steve’s toes. “No, no. It’s good. I wanted to remember the first time I kissed you.”

“Oh,” Steve breathes, then leans in and kisses Bucky again.

“Don’t have sex on my basketball court!” Tony yells from above.

“Use protection!” adds Sam.

Pepper giggles from behind her hand and all three of them disappear from the window. Steve and Bucky are too preoccupied with each other’s mouth to notice.


End file.
